So. Hey. College. It's been four months and 26 days since I last wrote a journal.

Things have changed since then. Of course, college is the biggest one.

I don't really know why I'm writing this. I don't have anything particularly happy or sad to say. I don't have anything particularly interesting or peculiar to say.

All I'm saying is: hello.

Okay fine. In an effort to make this somewhat entertaining, here are some simple fixes for a wide range of issues.

If you're chocking on an ice cube, pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. The blockage will instantly disappear.

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.

If you're male, avoid arguments about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then you'll be afraid to cough.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.



And to inform you all of my newest obsession:

Today, on the way home from school, I was stuck in traffic for about an hour. When I finally reached the cause, I saw that it was a police car that had rear-ended another police car, and that the police were just standing around looking at this in shock. MLIA

Today, I went to McDonalds and saw a vacuum cleaner chained to the bike rack. Never have I had so many questions. MLIA

Hahaha

Love yah all

--Kai Jenski